There I was, lying face up with my knees to the ceiling. Naked and staring at the lights while getting my vagina swabbed from front to back.
“Yeast Infection,” my doctor told the nurse. “Yup, I knew it from the minute I saw it,” she replied. I didn’t know whether or not I was more confused or embarrassed. How in the world did I–a germaphobe who showered three to four times a day–get a yeast infection?
“Don’t worry , this is the norm. In fact, 80% of the women who come and see me during the Summer have it. It’s warm out and vaginas tend to get more moist during this time of year–it makes for the perfect environment for yeast.”
It took me a few days to muster up the courage to make that appointment for my Gynecologist but I knew something was up when I started to feel less normal. To be frank, my vagina was way more moist than usual and although Trina and Khia once boasted that being super wet would be a gift, I quickly learned that it was something more like a curse.
You see, my twenties has brought me a bunch of reality checks that my vag wasn’t ready to cash. Gone are the days of eating mountains of sugary candy and wearing those tight and silky five for $25 Victoria Secret G-Strings. In my twenties, I have learned that my vagina needs a little more TLC. First up, this yeast.
But before I popped the Diflucan my doctor prescribed me, I was on a mission to find something that was more on the organic side. So I tested just about every online at-home remedy to see if it worked and lets just say it was an experience like no other.
First up, “The Garlic Tampon”. Garlic kills yeast, they said. Old Wives Tales say that you have a few options when it comes to garlic. Consume it, any way you’d like (liquid or solid). Stick a clove in your vag or soak a tampon in garlic and sleep with it inserted overnight. So I tried them all and I want to let you know the most important step that just about everyone forgot to mention. DILUTE – because although garlic may kill yeast it also sets fire to the rain. Either I didn’t have it inside of me long enough to kill the yeast or the remedy just didn’t work, but unless you have an inferno down there and don’t mind going to work/school smelling like you’re cooking I’d say, use this remedy at your own risk.
Next, I tried yogurt. Tons of it, as yogurt is said to have the “good” bacteria that is used to fight the “bad” bacteria. However, if the yogurt you are using isn’t plain and unsweetened you run the risk of making the infection worst and this, my friends, was my case.
Lastly, I tried Apple Cider Vinegar, after all it worked wonders on my natural hair. However, just like garlic, ACV burned and unless you’re Usher and willing to “Let It Burn” this might not be the remedy for you.
It was at that very moment that I realized that internal impurities couldn’t be fixed using exterior solutions. So I began taking a look at my diet and cutting out the sugary things that I had been binging on over the past few months–gummy bears, soda, and that good Ol’ Chik-fil-A lemonade, and it was almost at that very instant that I was able to start tackling the Candida that was attempting to cock-block me.
So what finally worked for me? A sugarless diet, a trusty pair of 100% cotton underwear, incorporating more garlic in my meals, incorporating sugarfree yogurt in my meals, taking a shot of Apple Cider Vinegar each morning and that good ol’ Diflucan.
Lesson Learned: You don’t have to die to kick it.